Soul Free

Lesson: Partnerships Over Power

As I drove through a rural town outside Addis Ababa, I witnessed a moment I’ve never forgotten: a small boy, no older than six, tugging with all his might on the rope of a massive bull. The boy pulled. The bull refused. It was a stalemate — strength versus determination, neither gaining an inch.

The scene made me think deeply about leadership. How often do we find ourselves in that same dynamic?

Sometimes we are the boy, putting all our effort into pulling people toward our vision — tugging, coaxing, insisting — only to realize that no amount of force will move someone who isn’t ready.
Other times we become the bull, planted firmly in our position, unmoved by the ideas, needs, or perspectives around us. We hold our ground because it feels safe, familiar, or simply because we want to be the one in control.

But here’s the truth the boy and the bull reveal:
Power struggles stall progress. Partnerships create it.

Leadership isn’t about trying to pull people along or digging in and refusing to budge. It’s about finding alignment — understanding what motivates others, where they’re coming from, and how to move together instead of against each other.

Partnerships ask different questions than power does:

• Not “How do I make you move?” but “How do we move together?”
• Not “How do I get my way?” but “What’s the best way forward for us?”
• Not “How do I assert authority?” but “How do I build trust?”

When we stop pulling and start partnering, things shift. People follow not because they’re forced, but because they’re inspired, included, and valued. And when we stop being the bull — rigid, immovable — we open the door to growth, collaboration, and solutions bigger than any one person’s idea.

The boy and the bull weren’t going anywhere as long as they stayed locked in opposition. The same is true for teams, families, and relationships.

Partnership over power isn’t just a leadership strategy — it’s a mindset.
A reminder that influence comes not from pulling harder, but from walking beside someone and choosing the path together.